When you think about self-improvement, you may picture a pile of self-help books on your nightstand with inspiring, upbeat titles. However, behavioral change and positive psychology expert and developmental psychologist Sasha Heinz, Ph.D., argues that self-help isn't just about feeling good and forgetting the past but often about facing reality head-on and remaining optimistic about one's future. It is not light or meaningless. It's true everywhere and affects everyone.
Listen to this episode of the mindbodygreen podcast to hear
Heinz debunk the three largest myths about self-help and happiness.
Read More : Mavie Global
Only Good Energy, Please.
Those unfamiliar with self-help may dismiss it as
"positive vibes only" or "cheesy," as Heinz puts it. Saying
something like, "That is completely false." In fact, focusing on the
bright side alone won't help you succeed. Heinz argues that a person's
pessimism is just as significant as their self-confidence and their ability to
see the best in others.
"Brush that dream up against cold, brutal reality. You
may find yourself wondering, "How am I going to get through
these?"" Instead of living in an optimistic fantasy, success is more
likely when you plan for the things that might not succeed.
However, this doesn't mean you shouldn't put in the effort
to maintain an optimistic outlook before diving headfirst into a negative one.
And yet, as Heinz puts it, "if you really want to convert that goal into a
reality, your pessimism is on your side." "Some friction or tension
within is useful, as it prompts us to take action. Forced to respond, we do so."
Not Everyone is Interested in Self-Improvement.
Heinz argues that self-improvement is not a character feature, even though certain people are likelier to pick up
self-help books than others. We "pretend" that "this person is
into it" and "this one isn't," but "we're all in this
process of growth and development," she continues. That children grow, and
change is something on which we can all agree.
No one should cease being encouraged to grow and be equipped
for success just because they've reached a certain age. What if we carried on
that way throughout adulthood, Heinz wonders. That's our big job in life, to
keep developing like we did when we were youngsters. If you aren't making
progress toward your goals, you may begin to feel stuck.
You Can't Shortcut Your Way to Mindfulness.
This last misconception may come as a surprise, but it
shouldn't because we have many easy ways to improve your disposition.
The misconception comes in the motivation: "This notion that
you're going to find the shortest hack, to me, is something that decreases
work," explains Heinz. As a result, when practicing mindfulness proves
difficult, some may be tempted to give up on the idea altogether because of the
false impression they've been given that it requires no work.
And yet, that doesn't mean you should abandon all attempts
at conscious living. Modify the meaning slightly: "Avoid characterizing it
as a "hack" for your brain. Changing your routine on a daily basis is
the most important factor, "she explains. Using
the trick may not make practicing mindfulness simpler, but it can make dealing
with stress easier in the future.
Read More : Mavie Global
Lesson Learned.
Despite the popularity of self-help books, articles on
positive psychology, and discussions on the pursuit of happiness, we still need many details. Heinz claims that everyone could use a little
more mental fitness, even though "self-help" has
become somewhat nebulous (self-care following close behind). It won't be easy,
but "every accomplishment needs a lot of uncomfortable action," she
says.
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